Would SOMEONE, ANYONE who reads this blog and knows Terry PLEASE, upon my exit, give him these instructions so that he may live in this world without me? Here are a few, for starters....
1. Laundry can be folded and put away. Really, it doesn't like being piled on the floor outside the dryer on a big blanket for everyone to rummage through. Even if you think that's ingenious, it's not. And before you fold it, please make sure the clothing is completely dry. Not wet around the waistbands and inside the pockets....the kids like their clothing dry. Same with socks. And yes, you will need to pair them up, they are not magnetic.
2. Bills, yes, we have them. Please call the bank (if you don't remember which one we use, look on the back of your debit card, the greenish piece of plastic in your wallet next to your fishing license, and call the first number you see) and ask them to walk you through internet banking...everything you need to know is there. It doesn't happen by itself....it will need your guidance at least once a month.
3. The children must wear different clothing to school everyday. This includes socks and underwear.
4. Kroger will not come to you. Food doesn't automatically appear in the kitchen and when you buy it and take it home, it doesn't float to the kitchen either. Again, it needs your guidance. BUY FRUIT!
5. We don't have a cleaning lady, and the one that you had, has moved on if you're reading this.
6. Firestone won't come to the house to change your oil and rotate and align your tires. The personal servant you had that did this for you, again, has moved on if you're reading this.
7. Poptarts are not meant for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Same goes for Doritos.
8. Lillie will not brush her hair, even if she tells you she did. You have to do it.
9. Feed the animals, twice a day. They like fresh food and water.
10. Kids need baths, several times a week. Don't let them tell you they've washed and everything....they lie! You must do it for them!
11. And lastly, the alarm clock doesn't know how to set itself. It's not that smart. You must do it yourself.
Love you! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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1 comment:
OMG that was so funny I almost peed myself!
Poor Terry - you must add "rinse bath toys for they are not clean from use in bath" and "sheets on bed do not self-clean, they need to be stripped every so often"
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